I have had many questions over the last 6 months, and most of them are some form of “
This is a track that is easy to get on and hard to get off.
There are usually no answers to these questions. Even if you know the medical details, there’s always the why of how those medical details came to be.
Recently, I’ve been coming to terms with a mantra that is helping me heal.
I’ll be honest—it’s a hard one to accept! It’s not an answer. It doesn’t fix anything. However, it does help you move on.
This is the basic idea: maybe nothing has gone wrong. Maybe things were meant to be this way all along. Maybe there is a plan that includes whatever event that brought such pain and grief to you, and maybe that plan is beautiful.
One of my favorite ways to think of this is that God (or whatever power you believe in) is embroidering a picture using the threads of your life. From our point of view, it looks like a disaster, with threads going all over the place.
We think, “How could this ever turn into something beautiful?”
And yet, at some point, we see the other side and it all makes sense. Oh, the pink threads are for that flower, and the brown threads for the roof! And the white threads that made seemed so random before made the dove at the window.
If you can find some faith in this idea, you can let go of the why and move on to the question of how to keep moving.
This idea does not erase the pain, and it is not something you can really say to someone else. However, if you can accept it yourself, you can move on to the pain of living with grief, rather than living in the pain of why.
This mantra gives you the power to move on.
One of my favorite examples of this from the Bible is maybe the most important event to ever occur in the history of the earth. We know that Christ had to die for us to live, and yet, his disciples didn’t understand that. They thought something had gone wrong (Luke 24:21). They only saw the ending, not the beginning of something beautiful and wonderful.
I hope I articulated these ideas in such a way that makes sense. Take it or leave it, but this idea has helped me so much, and I hope it helps you, too.
My love to you and your loved ones in your grief and hard times!